that moment...

when you hear a mosquito buzzing around your head


so annoying.

For the life of me...

I do NOT understand the fascination with Shark Week.

Do I think sharks are mildly interesting?

Yes

Do I understand why people want to learn more about sharks?

Yes

Do I think we need an entire week once a year dedicated to nothing else?

Absolutely not.

Am I currently watching a shark show on Discovery channel?

Yes. And there is a free diver diving without air with tiger sharks.
Bitches be crazy.


Shark week is taking over the TV, Facebook, and every other social network on the internet. Why don't they just have a weekly show? Problem solved.

I wrote this last night and never posted it. I'm glad I didn't though, or you wouldn't have gotten this little gem:



thanks annie!

well,

this pretty much sums it up.
have a hot, happy, or not-so-happy, wednesday.

xoxo

and the pity party comences.

birthdays are no fun when I'm not in the same city as all of my friends.

I was thinking that this birthday was less climactic than the ones in years past because there is nothing special about 23. Then Jessica said she would plan me a party and I realized, while thinking about who to invite, I have nobody to invite. All the people* that I usually invite aren't here. Why can't we apparate like Harry Potter? Like would be far less complicated, and you'd never have to worry about a designated driver either.

Life is so unfair.

**by people I really only mean Tamura.

/end pity party.

Friends?

I intend for this question to be completely serious.

There's this guy... (this should be hint that this post can go nowhere but down) that I have been off/on with for the past 6 years. Literally. Junior year of high school the saga began. He's hot when I'm cold, I'm hot when he's cold.

Right now, I'm cold. Freezing. I'm about to leave for Germany for 6 months. I'm not sure I'm capable of committing to relationship right now, without the added 'I'm leaving the country for 6 months' dynamic. I digress, he has accused me multiple times of leading him on. And he's gotten mad about it. (and vice versa) Let's not give the impression that he's innocent in the leading on area of this relationship (and I use the term Relationship loosely. really loosely) Recently I invited him to hang out.

Shame.
On.
Me.

Let's just say, he's hot right now. I'm not talking about my opinions of his looks either, which are not bad, by any means.

I didn't know it was not ok to ask an old friend to get together and catch up, or maybe I did, and I was just playing with fire. Well, darlings, I got Burned. He took me home and I totally had to dip out of that sketchy situation where you're avoiding the kiss.

I'm at a loss. Apparently, it is time to lose a friend. It's not fair to either of us to always keep each other on the back burner, especially if we're never both on the front burner. (that was a bad analogy, but you get the drift.) It makes me feel really guilty when I do it. I don't think that's fair either. Why should I feel guilty for just wanting to have a plutonic relationship with a member of the opposite sex.

Harry really knew what he was talking about...
sex** always gets in the way.

**There's no sex involved, just to clear the air. Not that it's any of your business. But you get my point.

I finally figured out my problem...

According to Pride and Prejudice:
"To be fond of dancing is a certain step towards falling in love..."

I hate dancing.
Mystery solved, I'm bound forever to be a spinster.

For the win!

Boys.

Obviously, boys are on my mind alot. That sounds funny... but seriously, recently I've had several conversations with girls and guys alike, all regarding guys - their behavior, what's acceptable in relationships, porn, etc.

Guys are interesting creatures... I'm sure they say the same about girls and that's fine, but I do think that we have compeletely different logic on most issues. We think about things differently. I recently read this article in Marie Claire about bachelor parties. It recounts several guys stories of their bachelor parties, or a friend's. The one thing that upset me the most was this: "You're only visiting a strip club when a guy gets dumped or engaged."

You have got to be joking... it's really scary that he just compared getting married to breaking up. This is unacceptable. You cannot tell me that these guys actually believe that this 'rite of passage' into marriage is celebrated with sleeping with a hooker. You want to have a night out with the guys, I'm totally ok with. I want a night with my girls every now and then, but there are boundaries. There are still rules, and the rules apply even when your are drinking, the night before you get married, the rules apply everyday and you don't get a 'hall pass' for special occasions. Furthermore, I read an article in Comso (I couldn't find it to post the link) that discussed guys watching porn. Basically it mentioned that as girlfriends, fiancees, and wives we should just accept the fact that the men we love are going to watch porn, and there is nothing that we can do about, we should just deal. NO! NO! NO! I will not put up with it. What is with this generation of guys... that think that they can get away with anything? I don't even want to start on the fact that the mainstream media continually condones these ideas and feeds these unbelievable truths to our young girls.

Porn is cheating, so is going to a strip club, and so is sleeping with or even kissing someone when you're drunk. It's all the same, it's all disrespectful, and it's all just plain rude. I've had several guys insinuate to me recently that if you're drunk then cheating on your girlfriend isn't nearly as bad. Maybe guys have been like this for generations. If so, I guess I might be single forever. We, as women, are constantly disrespected and then led to believe that we are stupid for feeling angry or insecure about it. This is not how relationships are meant to be.

My faith in humanity is slipping... espeically the part of humanity that has a penis.

file under: My apologies, I have no idea where this rant came from.

That moment...

when your brother walks into your office and lets a silent fart that instantly singes your nose hairs and then walks out.

Oh, wait, this never happens to you? It's an everyday occurence in my life, unfortunately...

file under: working with family - it has its ups and downs.

I watched St. Elmo's Fire for the first time...

the only thing on my mind the whole time was...

No, Rob Lowe. Just, no.