the end.

day 30 - who are you?

I am... a daughter. a sister. an aunt. a friend. a student. a girl.

This question reminds of a scene in "Eat, Pray, Love" when she is Italy and her friends are dicussing what word discribes them the best. Everyone has a word, just one that is who they are. When asked, she responds by using words like writer, friend, etc. They tell her that's what she is, not who she is. So she responds that she's in search of a word... (I couldn't find the exact conversation online.)

I think that fits me perfectly. I'm in search of who am. I know what I believe, I know what I love, what I want, but that's not WHO I am. I don't know who I am, but that really doesn't worry me, surprisingly. I've never been more free in my life, I've never been more comfortable with myself than I am right now. Life is about the adventure... and experiences. Finding yourself is all about how you handle those adventures and experiences. I don't know who I am, and I'm ok with that. One day, I might figure it out, but until then I'm just going to go with flow, make the most of what comes my way, and see where life takes me.

twentynine.

day 29 - what have you learned in the past month.

I've learned alot. I don't know how much of it can actually be contributed to this challenge though. Here's a few things, not just from the challenge. I've learned...

• I really like blogging.
• That my friends mean more to me than I realized.
• That it's possible I watch too many movies.
• I don't like spanish.
• A lot about Napoleon, I'd almost consider myself an expert.
• It's going to be hard to move away from my parents.
• I really hate when people are discouraging.
• I should count my blessings more often.
• Boys are silly.
• Using profanity in the classroom really irritates me, almost as much as know-it-alls.
• When I set my mind to something, I usually succeed. I just need to set my mind to things more often.
• I enjoy being busy, and social.
• I really miss my besties.
• Having a crush on a professor makes class much more enjoyable.
• Rekindling old friendships is a blessing.

its almost over.

day 28 - a picture of you a year ago and now. how have you changed? this was almost a year ago to the day.

this was not too long ago... end of august-ish.

and this was like last week or so ago.

I don't really thing I've changed that much (looks).. just the way I wear my hair. However, I'm much more mature today than I was a year ago. I'd like to think I'm a bit more self-aware. Certain situations and circumstances have allowed me to discover alot about myself. I also actually have a sense of direction now as opposed to a year ago when I had no clue what I wanted to with my life.

I wonder...

Is it bad that I just love me some Nick Cannon moving to the beat?
I'm watching Drumline... one of my faves! :)

While I'm here... lets do day 27.
Why am I doing this 30 day challenge??

Mostly because it's fun. I've learned quite a few things about myself. I enjoying blogging, but sometimes I just don't know what to write about. This has given me inspiration and ideas on things to write about. I'm also super glad I decided to do this because now I have a few friends that are doing it too! Now I can read about what's in their purse!

Have a wonderful saturday!

twentysix

day 26 - what i think about my friends.

Wow. I love them, to say the least. Without my friends I would be one lonely, sad, pathetic introvert. My friends inspire me in so many ways, creatively, spiritually, etc. They encourage me, which I often need! I can only hope that at least one of my friends reciporactes those feelings.

here's the Wikipedia definition...

Value that is found in friendships is often the result of a friend demonstrating the following on a consistent basis:

• The tendency to value what is best for the other.
• Sympathy and empathy
• Honesty, perhaps in situations where it may be difficult for others to speak the truth, especially in terms of pointing out the perceived faults of one's counterpart
• mutual understanding and compassion
• Trust in one another (able express feelings - including of the other's actions - without the fear of being judged); able to go to each other for emotional support
• Positive reciprocity - a relationship is based on equal give and take between the two parties.

I think that pretty much sums it up.

only 5 days left..

day 25 - what you would find in my bag.

I'm a typical girl. I have entirely too much in my purse. Sometimes it drives me crazy, but when I downsize, I always need whatever I take out as soon as I leave the house.

here's the skinny..
1. wallet - drivers license, debit card, STARBUCKS card, etc...
2. coin purse - because everyone needs a few dollars in change.
3. bobby pins/a hair clip - just in case
4. gum
5. chapstick
6. lip gloss
7. journal/notepad - in case i have some random inspiration or i need to write down i good quote.
8. jump drive
9. camera
10. cell phone - i cannot live without it.
11. pen and pencil - for school.
12. sunglasses
13. rewetting drops for my contacts
14. a book/kindle - either for school, or for pleasure.

I believe that's about it. That list was obnoxious, I'll admit, but I am not ashamed!!!

mishmash

day 24 - a letter to my parents...

I feel like the point of this would be to write something that I wouldn't normally say to my parents. My parents and I, thankfully, have a very open relationship. Obviously, there's a few things about my life that they don't know, but for the most part they know everything about me. They know when I go to the bars, they know if I'm going on a date, and they my point of view about almost everything. One thing they don't do is read my blog. All the more reason not to write a letter to them on here.

soo on another note --

Although I don't use tumblr much, I do have one. I found a new photography blog on it... check it out!! It's abosolutely wonderful... I think I'm going to try to shoot more film! Possibly buy a new fisheye from Lomography! If you've never heard of these cameras, take a look at the website! They are soo awesome! It makes me want a dark room in my house.. wouldn't life be grand!

Also, hopefully, some of my recent digital photography assignments will be posted soon! :)

23

day 23 - something you crave for a lot.

I'm not pregnant, so I don't often have cravings. Except for maybe things I'm addicted to: such as Starbucks, chocolate, the normal things. I do love Starbucks though. Mmmm so good. However, there are certain things that I long for... Like being alone. Sometimes I just love it when I have a free night of alone time. To just sit at home, order a pizza, drink some wine and watch a movie, without any interruptions. I put the cell phone away and just enjoy not thinking, not worrying, just being. I love it. This is one huge reason I don't want a roommate. I love being at home by myself when my parents go out of town. I cherish it.

On the opposite end of the spectrum... I long for family time as well. I enjoy spending time with all my family, not just immediate. I have a very large family, and some of my best memories are when we're all together, hanging out, playing games, eating, etc... It's just so much fun!!

day 22 -

 what makes you different from everyone else.

It's interesting, we always say, "No two people are exactly alike." However, do I have one quality that nobody else has. What makes me, me? I'm not sure that I have an answer to that question. Yes, my experiences and my life to this point have made me who I am today, but what makes me different from everyone else? I don't know. I don't have the slightest clue. I know that there are only a few people in this world that understand me. There's only a few people that understand why I am the way I am. There's only a few that understand what makes me tick, what effects me, why I am me.

Which makes me wonder, do I understand myself? Do I fully understand why I act the way I do, what makes me tick? The answer, No. Abosolutely not. Identity has always been something I've struggled with. My actions in the past have not been what I would like for them to be, which has made me believe that I not who I want to be. I have been, in the past, so quick to judge others, that I have began to judge myself. I don't feel that that is as much the case now, as it has been in the past, but it still has some truth, nonetheless.
(Wow, I changed tenses no less than 50 million times in those few sentences)

I have my own ideas, and don't care what people think, but thats not unique, those things were the typical hippy ideals. So, what makes me different from everyone else? I don't have an answer. Maybe you can think of something, and if you do please, do tell.

Until tomorrow,
C

day twentyone

21 - a picture of something that makes me happy.

New York City. I love it so much, my heart aches to make just when I see this picture. Everything about it makes me love it. The energy, the people, the shopping, the art. I love it all.

20.

day 20 - someone you see yourself marrying/being with someday.

Well I defiantely haven't met them yet. That's for sure...

I'm on the verge of giving up on men all together. Seriously, they jsut need to step it up...
here's a list of things I look for in a husband:

1. Makes me laugh.
2. Can wear skinny ties.
3. Older than me. I'm done with guys younger than me.
4. Honest.
5. Has a career, and knows where he's going in life.
6. Spontaneous.
7. Loves me even when I'm bitchy.
8. Is capable of living on his own. I want to be a wife, not a mother.

I wrote these down as they came to mind. Wearing skinny ties is not the second most important quality I look for in a man :)

dia 19

day 19 - nicknames you have and why you have them

My immediate family calls me sis.
I'm the sister. duh.
My mom calls me princess.
I'm the princess. That's why.
The nieces call me Tia.
Tia is aunt in spanish.
Aunt Deb calls me Badina.
I do not pretend to know where she got that from.

and everyone else calls me Christina.

Edit::
I cannot believe it!! I forgot a nickname...

CHRISTANKY!!
My bff Tam calls me that!! It's probably my favorite nickname of all!!
do that stankyleg!! :)

אַכצן

...thats eighteen in Yiddish.
I love google translate. :)

day 18 - plans/dreams/goals you have.

Plans:
I plan on graduating in December, moving out, hopefully away, and growing up a little. Most people say that moving away isn't all it's cracked up to be, but most people get to move off and go to college. Most people leave home at 18. Most people move out before they're 22. I'd like to think that at age 22, I'm capable of supporting myself a little bit better than most 18 year olds. I'd like to think that I'm a tad bit more responsible than most 18 year olds. So to those who think that moving out/away is a mistake... I say "Suck it. I don't want to hear it."
Where to I plan on moving you might ask... There are several possibilities, but right now I'm thinking about Denton. Why Denton, you might ask... because that's where UNT is. I'm hoping that this time next year I will be enrolled at University of North Texas, taking Art History classes and loving every minute of it.

Goals:
1. Grauate in December.
2. Go to UNT.
3. Graduate with my Masters in Art History.
4. Get a fabulous job at a museum or gallery, and spend my days surrounded by beautiful art and wonderful people.

Dreams:
Spend a significant amount of time in Europe, studying or just exploring. This is one thing that I must do before I die. Get married to wonderful man, who loves me, and shares some of the same dreams I do. Like my fourth goal, I want to spend my days surrounded by beautiul art, wonderful friends, and my family. More than anything, I want to look back in 20 years and have no regrets, and know that I've done everything that I wanted to do. I also want to know, that my goals and dreams only changed because of what I wanted, not because of someone else. I want to be able to say that I have lived my life to the fullest, and made the most of situation, and every circumstance, that I exceeded everyone's expectations, that I did everything I could to make my dreams come true.

SEVENTEEN.

day 17 - someone you would want to switch lives with for a day and why

Wow. When I first read this, so many people crossed my mind, but after some thought, I've decided.

First, Meryl Streep.
This lady. She is amazing. She's beuatiful, she's talented, she can sing. She's over 50 and she's got the goods. Obviously, I've never met her, so I don't know what she's like, but she sure seems pretty amazing. The woman has. it. going. on. End of story.

Secondly, Queen Victoria.
She took the thrown at age 18, and has had a lasting affect on her country. She was an advocate of the arts, and a all around beautiful soul, from what I've read. She fell in love and married her sweetheart, something many monarchs cannot brag about. The definition of class, I'm sure her achievements were the result of much hard work, but I would love to experience that. Just for a day... to walk outside and be admired, and know that every decision I make is going to affect the entire population of my country. The latter being why I would only want to do that for a day.

Lastly, my neices.
To be a kid again... how wonderful. To be carefree and worryless. They live life to the fullest, and have true innocence, something I feel like I lost a long time ago. The world is so black and white to them, so simple. The biggest problem they have in a day is possibly peeing their pants... and it's not like they get made fun of for it because their friends do it too. Oh man, to be a kid again. love.

diez y seis.

I've got spanish on the brain. Spanish 4 is going to be the death of me. I'm sure of it.
day 16 - another picture of yourself

the new hair... LOVE it. Shorter and Darker!

It's so much easier to fix!

shuffle shuffle shuffle

day 15 - put your iPod on shuffle : first 10 songs that play.
These 10 songs could not have been more random:
1. Don't Rock the Jukebox - Alan Jackson
2. Fever - Takka Takka
3. Great Romances of the 20th Century - Taking Back Sunday
4. Carrying Your Love With Me - George Strait
5. Wth>You - Linkin Park
6. The Let Down - White Tie Affair
7. I Caught Myself - Paramore
8. Are We the Waiting - Green Day
9. Pts. of. Athrty - Linkin Park
10. Looking For a Good Time - Lady Antebellum

I'd say this is a pretty good representation of all the different genres I like, minus rap. So weird that there were two Linkin Park songs, from the same cd!!

-C

day 14

I went out of town with the rents this past weekend, we went antiquing (yes, we've made a noun into a verb, I know it's not a real word.) in Round Top, TX. It was so much fun, I'll post pictures of my new mirror and new lamps ASAP. Anyway, that's why I'm so late with thes posts.

so moving on... day 14 - post a picture of your family.

13

day 13 - a letter to someone who has hurt you recently.

For the first time in a long time, no body has hurt me recently. I will say that in recent years, I have learned that Elenor Roosevelt was very correct when she said "Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent." If you don't let poeple hurt you, you won't get hurt. If you feel like nobody loves you, maybe you need new people in your life. At some point you must ask yourself, "Do I need this person in my life that's hurting me?" Granted, I'm not talking about a best friend who snapped at you because she was PMSing... this is repeat offenders. I'm sure this challenge wasn't talking about repeat offenders, but if it's a one-time thing, then it doesn't need to be addressed on blogger. just saying...

I'm probably the world's worst about playing the victim. For the longest time, it was always people hurting me, never the other way around. If I hurt someone, it was obviously because they hurt me first. I'm not perfect, but i have learned that that is no excuse to retaliate. Not to mention, stress and drama just take years off your life. I've been basically drama free for the last year, and this has probably been the best year of my life. I've made new friends, been boy free, and learned from my mistakes. I don't want to give the illusion that I don't have problems, and I don't get my feelings hurt, but there's no point in dwelling on it. There's no point in having people in your life that make you feel like you're not important, or you don't matter. I've branched out, made new friends, surrounded myself with people that care about me, that are there for, that challenge me to be better. I truly believe that that is the biggest reason why I'm at the place I'm in now.

and that's that.

12

I'm out of ideas for new ways to say a number.

day 12 - how you found out about Tumblr and why you got one.

In case you weren't aware, this is not a Tumblr. I know, I'm a genius. :)
So I'll talk about blogger...
I don't know why I originally got a blog, and I'm still not sure why I have one.. I guess I just like writing and posting pictures for other people to see. I don't know..
I found out about blogger from my cousin. I started reading her's and I guess that's actually why I got one, because it looked like fun!

so that's that.

oh I cut my hair yesterday. 4 inches. and dyed it dark dark dark brown
hopefully a picture will be up soon!

a day late..

day 11 - another picture of you and your friends..

I used all the good ones in the last post... I probably should have read ahead. you only get one today..

love these girls...